When you’ve made the decision to address the causes of burnout and begin the process of change, it can feel exhilarating. So, when the exhaustion hits and the tears won’t stop, what keeps you going? Having a foundation of support is necessary when doing the hard work of change. I want to share the things that helped me on my journey towards mental clarity and freedom from overwhelming anxiety and depression so that you can start living the life that God is calling you to.
Just because change is slow does not mean that it’s not happening. It’s a process. It will take time. But little by little, each week, each month, the next year, if you commit to change you will see growth. Just like a flower can only grow when it rains, so hard things in life serve to grow us to become more resilient and beautiful. The goal of any change for the Christian is looking more like Jesus at the end. (Eph 4:22-24)
I repeated this simple phrase when I caught myself rushing to the next thing, which was often. This in turn caused me to notice the simple things in life and thank God for them. Like a walk with my dog, a stunning sunrise, a delicious beverage, an unhurried afternoon with family. When I began to slow down, I started to notice how beautiful life truly is. This cultivated gratitude and reminded me that there is more to life than my struggles. By trusting that God was in control, I relaxed into the simple joys of life while learning more about what I truly loved. Both filled my heart with gratitude and thanks to God. (1 Sam 12:24)
The emotional exertion of working through unprocessed emotions is intense and will leave you feeling drained. Give yourself grace. Don’t make too many plans. Enjoy having a free evening and whatever you do, don’t feel the need to fill your time. That was a temptation early on–always needing to do something to feel productive–to prove my worth. There were days when what I needed most was a nap. By slowing down and listening to my body’s need for rest, I actively trusted in God to take care of things.
Bringing people into the process of growth and change is vital and will sustain you in the hard times. I knew I couldn’t do this work alone. Each of these people knew the specifics of what caused me to burn out, my tendencies to fall back into old thought patterns and had permission to lovingly call me out. These encompassed all areas of my life, here are just a few examples: I had regular check-ins with my direct supervisor to access my workload. This required honesty and transparency on my part. I had weekly meetings with my discipular for encouragement and to help process what I was learning in therapy. And last, my siblings gathered every month to talk through shared history and have fun as a family. Find safe people and share your life when them. This is part of healing (Jame 5:16).
A verse that I hung on my wall and saw everyday was Psalm 16:11, “In your presence, there is fullness of joy.” While in the middle of the hardest times and through all the tears and anxious days, I wasn’t very joyful. I longed to experience the joy that can only be found in the presence of God. So, when the journey towards healing accompanied by hard life circumstances felt unbearable, I told God all of it and in return felt His unconditional love. To feel the love of God despite my anxiety, my fear, my striving for perfection, my worry, my tired body, my pursuit of approval was overwhelming and liberating. There was nothing I needed to do to make God love me more. He only asks that I give Him my worries (1 Peter 5:7). So, I gave each negative thought, each tear, each hurtful memory, each journal entry to God and let Him love me. This was freedom.
In the beginning, I had to give myself a lot of grace, which was not easy since I was recovering from working on overdrive. But slowly, over time, I began to see progress. I became more aware of my thinking, able to communicate my limits, surrounded myself with people who knew about my journey and encouraged rest. I prioritized reading the Bible and prayer into my daily rhythm and set aside time for silence and solitude.
Your story of burnout will look different than mine. The way you get there and how you work through it will be different. But God is with you through all of it. He sees your anxious heart and wants you to give it to Him because He loves you. We cannot do anything apart from the work of Jesus (John 15:5). So, whatever led you to a place of burnout, know that He is waiting to walk alongside you towards healing and wholeness. With Him is joy, peace and freedom that I can’t wait for you to experience for yourself.
Kayla serves as the Soul Care Ministry Coordinator at College Park Church, where she helps create spaces of hope and healing. She loves good books, deep conversations, and cozy nights in with her husband, Jordan, and their rescue cat.
